Happy New Year!

Christmas always comes before New Year's Eve. It's a fact. The more things change the more things stay the same. Yup. We can rely on Christmas coming before January 31st.
Well, this gave me a problem this year and it makes me wonder why we can't celebrate Christmas after January 1st.
Here's why: I was invited to a New Year's Eve Ball on the 31st of December and found the most divine sleek, classical black satin gown (strapless) for the occasion. All it needed was a choker of classically chunky diamonds to set it off as the last word in high fashion. Little pause for thought there as my bank account couldn't quite stretch to accommodate a set of Fink's chunky diamonds, but no problem, rhinestones work quite well, and you don't have to worry about highway robbers. But I digress.
 The dress fit like snakeskin - sleek, smooth and satiny with tiny buttons down the back disguising a zipper that would presumably keep it all together and hold everything up. Trouble was I first tried it on two weeks before Christmas and it fit like snake skin. Four weeks later, after a few Christmas parties, a sip of eggnog here and there, a martini one night and Christmas dinner combined with a trip to San Francisco and more than a few sips of Sonoma and Napa wines - not so much.
 I began to worry about the dress on the way home from San Francisco. I got onto the plane with my hand luggage bulging with left over truffles and chocolate Santas and my jeans bulging - with me. How could this be? These jeans used to be the most comfortable pants I owned. Did the California water shrink them? Probably not.

When I got home, I couldn't look the skinny dress in the face without daggers of guilt piercing my  bulges and did my best to avoid eye-contact with it as I anxiously finished up the chocolate I'd unpacked and started on the Virginia Peanuts and and leftover walnuts in the fridge. This was not good - but the more I thought about it, the more I munched 'til on the morning of the big dance I came to my senses and raced off to Zumba to loose five pounds in one hour. Didn't happen. I tried starving myself all day and at the last moment I took the dress down and tried it on ... drum roll...
Twenty minutes later, with two people tugging and sucking and squeezing, the zipper shot up my back. "Yessss!" I squeaked, because that seemed to be the only sound I could make. I tried to let out a sigh of relief only to find out that sighs are driven by air and I had precious little to spare in my lungs which appeared to be somewhere in the vicinity of my Adam's apple. Or was that my boobs? Whatever, they were quite spectacular in this trussed up mode.
 But breathing was definitely a source of concern. I rode to Roanoke to the dance, flattened out in the front seat of the car like a python who's eaten too much - go figure... stretching my lungs out to help with inhalation.
My emergency dress was in the back seat. 

The emergency dress was in the back seat in the event that the Old Year went out with a Bang! and I popped out of my sleek black satin like a watermelon pip sometime during the evening.Or worse still, that the zipper split and that silky smooth gown slithered elegantly down my legs pooling in a puddle of elegant black satin around my feet.
"We'll just tell everyone you're part of the entertainment," My date Jim said. "We'll say we couldn't afford a cake so you popped out of your dress instead."

Bad joke. I could feel myself hyperventilating. Smelling salts - I needed smelling salts. Jim didn't think CVS carried them.

***

I needn't have worried about any of this, as it turned out. My posture was perfect (had to be or - Pop!) as I tottered into the ballroom on Jim's arm. The chunky rhinestones sparkled, and I took small wispy breaths and everything was fine.
 I must write a note to the 3M company (or whoever makes these wonderful zippers) thanking them profusely for their craftsmanship and wishing them a Happy New Year.

Happy New Year to you too. Let's all hope that 2013 exceeds all our best hopes for a really good New Year. The blog is coming back and when it does, there are two new books to tell you about. In the meantime, Love, health and happiness to us all! Chocolates are out for a while, though.
 

FEAR - THE MOST FEARFUL OF ALL THINGS

    The emotion of fear is in fact, the most fearful of all things. And the fear of death is one of its most prolific cultivations. It seems to be at the root of all adversity, the driving force used by fearful people to control their environment. Have you noticed how fearful people become mean people, offensive human beings, unhappy and vengeful? In its worst disguise I think fear is a killer of all that this happy, peaceful and loving.
     It is one of the reasons I felt compelled to write "By Morning's Light". My thinking was that if I could lessen the fear of dying by taking some of the fear out of the great unknown, I could bring some peace to people and in so doing, make this world a little happier, less stressed and allow people to fill that space with the far greater emotion of love - for each other and the world we live in.
     Wouldn't that be luverly!
     But sadly, there are people who are afraid to read the book because it might scare them. Fear of death and the unknown are in control here. Think so? Fear of sorrow and sadness.
     What if by reading this book you learned that there is nothing to fear?
     The great Hindu pacifist, Mohandas Ghandi has been quoted as saying that the more he thought about it, the more he studied, the more he became convinced that sorrow over death maybe the greatest illusion. "There is no death," he said. "No separation of substance." 
    What if by reading "By Morning's Light," I could show you that we don't die? Our physical bodies stop working when, for whatever reason, old age, illness or accident, the source of their energy departs. But in the reality of the collective consciousness, their spiritual energy is still very much alive, very much within our own sphere of consciousness, our own physical and ethereal space. It hasn't left us.
     But you already know this. You're just not sure you believe it. Have you ever felt a spirit? Or seen one in a dream? Most of us have felt the presence of loved ones who have left this earth. And most of us shake our heads in disbelief and say, "I must have had too much coffee." Or "Pure coincidence! Only a dream!"
     It's not easy to admit you've seen a ghost. Nobody wants to feel like an idiot. And its not surprising - it wasn't so long ago that some of us were burned at the stake for believing such things. The whole village showed up for the fireworks!
     Well, I believe such things, and I'm not afraid of institutional councils or inquisitions. I'm hoping to light up the village in a very different way, with light that can permeate the darkest part of our greatest fear - the fear of death.
    We don't die, she says! What nonsense.
     But what if I'm right. What if I could crack that window open for you, allowing you to light up the dark for a minute, an hour - maybe longer.
     My book has done, and is doing, that for thousands of people. It's a great read. Sad, sure. But mostly happy, uplifting, funny and very real. It's a quick read with the most common comment being "I couldn't put it down.
     I hope you'll read it and if you get to the end of it I hope that even if you're not convinced, you'll ask yourself, "What if? What if Ginny's right?"
     And he book will have done its job.
   
     Tomorrow I'll write about my cat - who is afraid of nothing. :)   
     
    
     

GO TEAM!!

Hi Everyone,

Tomorrow, the publisher of  'By Morning's Light' pulls their safety net out from under me, leaving me to carry on the publicity with out them. I have no complaints. They've given me three good months of their weight behind the book, as well as the force of their publicity team headlining and spot-lighting the title, but now it's time for them to move onto the next batch of books and leave me to my own devices. Sink or swim in other words.
So, I"M SWIMMING!  Who'd like to be on  my team? One way or another, I'm pushing this book to the NYT Bestseller list - are you coming? Climb aboard - when we can afford it, there'll be cocktails all around but for now we've got to get paddling. (The 200 hp Mercury outboard motor is on order)
     Here's what I'm talking about: I was in Barnes & Noble a couple of days ago, nonchalantly walking by the bookshelf that hold's "By Morning's Light." A man was standing there reading something else.NOT my book. So I wandered by, lightly and breezily - humming a little tune - and with a great deal of cooool I casually pointed to my book and said, "Have you read this book?" He jumped and shook his head looking a little panicked. "Well, you have to read it," said I. "It's absolutely amazing !" And wandered off before he could turn it over and see the picture on the cover.
     Now. That was a mistake according to one of the team. "You should have offered to sign it!" She said. And she's right. Put the thing in his hands and pull out a pen and before you know it he's wandering towards the check-out looking dazed. That's strategy # 1.
So, team, next time you're in any bookstore that's carrying The Book, you know what to do. And if he has a friend, give them two. Desperate times call for desperate measures so the tough have to get going. Try not to shove or push anyone up against the wall though. Threats are out, unless you can come up with something like, "I think I'm going to cry ..." Only works with some men, so not totally reliable."Buy it or else!" - not so much...
     If you're in a bookstore that isn't carrying the book (God forbid) - casually ask, "Why the Hell not?"Grab a pen off the desk and write down "HOW TO ORDER! Llewellyn.com - Amazon.com -Ginnybrock-author.webs.com" And say "There! Don't you know this book is on it's way to the NYT Best Seller list? Everybody's asking for it!"  That's strategy #2
     Seriously. If you liked the book, please introduce it to your book clubs. If you know anyone you think it would help, give them a copy or go to the bookstore with them so you can show them where its stashed. (And look out for potential 'sales' at the same time) If you work for a hospice group, an intensive care facility, bookstores or libraries, or belong to women's groups, grief support  groups or any group - tell them about Morning's Light. That's strategy #3 
   
GO TEAM! I'm betting on YOU! (No whining!) We're going all the way to New York!!

How Cool is That!

     I love this book!
     "By Morning's Light" is minds, opening hearts and - guess what! Opening windows. To see through!
I have lost count of the readers who have called me or emailed or dropped a card to say something like : "You'll never guess what happened to me!"
     And then I hear, "I had this most amazing dream last night - I saw my mom for the first time since she died three years ago and she spoke to me! It looked like her - only younger - but most of all it felt like her and all the love I had came back and I realized it was still there and so is she."
     Another person wrote that he felt his brother walking beside him beside him as he walked to his car and when he turned the radio on, a favorite song that they used to ham it up, with kid microphones, was playing on the car radio.
    Someone else saw a rainbow as she was driving home and knew immediately that the son she lost was riding with her.   
     Someone else called me and said, "Strange thing happened last night! I dreamed I was walking along a ridge stepping very carefully because there was a steep drop on one side. Then I lost my footing in the dream and fell. I grabbed onto something, clutched onto the edge of the ridge to stop myself from falling - and woke up."
     What was so strange was that the next morning, this person was walking around a sail boat marina looking for boats that might be for sail and during his walk he went on board one of them and found himself walking somewhat precariously along the side deck holding onto stays and railings where he could, stepping very carefully. Then he came to a section where there was no rail and lost his footing. His foot slipped over the side and the next thing he knew he was headed for the water with his car keys, his cell phone and his wallet all about to get lost in the deep. He grabbed frantically at anything he could find to stop his fall and wound up dangling over the water, both hands clutching the edge of the deck. Eventually, a little bloodied and banged-up, he managed to heave himself on board and avoid a costly fall.
     One of those pre-cognitive dreams, you think? I think so.
     I have also had a lot of feed back from people who have asked for signs and gotten them - three-fold.      And one who avoided a certain street - for no reason - and only later discovered that a tractor trailer had overturned and spilled a noxious mess all over the area.
      I love it that just by reading the book, people are becoming more aware, more intuitive and starting to acknowledge those gifts that we all possesss. Learning to re-activate that wonderful 6th sense!
     How cool is that!
     Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences. It fills my heart to know that this book is talking to so many. If you haven't felt it yet, you will, and when you do, you'll find that it takes you on a journey of exploring new perspectives, other worlds and exciting new frontiers, dimensions and forgotten existences.
     Too, too cool!
 

Infinity.................................................................

What a word - infinity - something without end. The word has the sound of a train whistle lonesome and long, winding its way across endless prairies and mountains that pick up the sound and carry it forward into an infinite time space.
I must have been about ten when I first heard that word. That impressionable age where all kinds of weird things matter. Infinity was one of those things in my world and outside of it and way outside of that .... that really mattered. I can remember lying awake one night trying to imagine infinity. My father said that trying to imagine infinity will drive you mad, so I quit. Things were confusing enough as it was without having to deal with madness.
When it was first explained to me (in so far as anyone can explain it) my forth grade teacher said, "Imagine a bird building a mountain higher than Everest. To build the mountain he will have to carry one grain of sand at a time from all the seashores surrounding all the continents and islands of the earth. When he has done that, he will be just be at the start of infinity. Yup.
Lying there in bed my mind reeling from this thought I began to wonder where would he go next? Would he clean out the deserts? The prairies? And when that was done would he leave our world for other worlds and then other universes? Dear God! This infinity thing can go on and on! 
How many universes are there?
Don't even go there. If you do, you may as well call up the paddy wagon - right now. How many galaxies are there? Too many.
And what about those millions of galaxies and billions of universes? Are we the only life there is?
Sleep well  :)

Multiple Shades of Blue

     "The Blues don' Care Whose Got 'em." Ain't that the truth.
     I don't often get depressed or down or covered up by the blues. But August will do that to me. I can feel myself going down sometime in the first week and things get a little worse every day and because it's been a year since this happened, I've forgotten why it's happening. So while I'm sitting there feeling low and racking my brain for answers, feeling like a dork which brings on another shade of blue, and that curly blob of white matter that's my brain is tossing out things like, "Your dock blowing away is enough to give anyone the blues!" True. But it can be fixed. Anything that you can fix is not a problem, I say. And then it comes up with the cracked tooth. What about the cracked tooth? Yup. the one I thought I was going to have to refinance the house to pay for (that'll give you a deeper shade of blues) and don't forget the filling that fell out  - that was months ago, I remind my brain - Well, it says, I'm out of reasons - except that the cat peed on your new bath mat.
     I remember that. I'm hoping Miss Kitty's got a pale shade of the blues following my raised voice and door slamming behind her. But of course she hasn't. The door slamming may have given her pause for thought simply because it closed off the entrance to her automatic feeder but other than that, she feels she's made her point about me going away for two days.
     After a few days, my brain stops thinking, and I hear a whisper, "It was in August that you saw Drew for the last time."  
     Of course. It's strange how your heart, your spirit remembers and creates a physical reaction long before you've figured out, why all of a sudden, you're sad.
    Knowing what's wrong helps. I can find the way out.
    I adjust my sails and catch the first wind out of this blue morass. I leave my busy, physical brain behind and sail my mythical ship out into the ocean where the deep blue waves are smooth and long, cresting and retreating into never ending valleys, smoothing the way, evening out the the course. A course that is peaceful and very beautiful in its indigo mood. My being fills with its lullaby as starlight stabs pricks the darkness and my heart rests.  
     Soon I will notice the sunlight sparking the depths of this ocean, lighting the blues that color its surface with the translucence of violet and turquoise. And not long after that, the light-filled waves will lift my boat easing it towards the pale blue, shallow waters of the bay - a safe and peaceful harbor.

     And I will live another day to deal with Miss Kitty. Lucky for her, or she'd have to bone up on her hunting skills which might bring her down with a terrible case of the blues.
     So keep this thought. When the winds get low, pick up the oars and paddle. Keep paddling. Or as they say in Virginia, "Keep on Keepin' on!"
     
  

Out of the Mouths of Babes

   Why do we say "Out of the Mouths of Babes"  when a child pops out with an undeniable truth or observation?
   I have an idea. If you believe as I do, (or even play with that belief) you know that we are much more than human from the time we slide into this human reality. We're much more interesting than that! We're spirits, who've decided to get out feet wet in this ocean of emotional, volitile, happy, sad, human condition. And as such, isn't it reasonable to believe that the newest earth-comers, our children, still remember where they came from? The memories are fresh. And if you can remember where you came from, you probably haven't lost those truths and values that are part of the spirit you. So, every so often, something clicks, and one of those truths leak through intact. Pay close attention. There's much to be re-learned.
   Our grown up truths are, sadly, no longer intact. For most of us, they've been twisted or changed or re-interpreted to mean something they don't mean at all. Sometimes the things we pop out with are just plain nonsense.
   You know as well as I do that we're all vulnerable to the manipulation and distortion of our thoughts and highest ideals. Sometimes we recognize the manipulation that's taking place and can switch back to what we know to be true, but sometimes we don't. It's just part of being human and one of those challenges that we struggle with.
   Young children are different.They haven't been here long enough to have had their minds and spirits distorted. Mainly because we, the 'grown ups' have been too busy teaching them how to walk and talk. It's only later that we start messing with their thoughts.
The exciting thing to me is that if left alone, young children can tell you a lot about where they came from. And the stork didn't have much to do with it.
Try asking an under-five year old, "Where were you before you got here? Before you were born." When I asked my granddaughter that she looked at me as though I'd flipped and said, "My mommy's tummy, Mimi!"  Don't you know anything, Mimi  implied. So you may have to persevere. Say, "Yes, I know that but what about before you were in your mommy's tummy?" Watch the facial expression, the hand movements and then listen to the answer. Fascinating. If you wait too long it'll be too late because someone will have told them not to tell lies or  "That's nonsense!" They know it's not but they shut down.
     My grand mother encouraged me and I encouraged mine, and I am especially aware of what my grand children say.
     Have fun with it. Don't you like to share memories? So do they.

 

July 21st 2012

Today is Drew's 30th birthday. He said to me once, when he was 17, hot and sweaty on the way home from football practice, ""I don't think I'm going to live to be very old." Well, he was right - he wouldn't be here on earth, living with us on this earthly plain today - when he should have turned thirty earth years old.

But strange things happen around my house, as you may have read, and today was no exception. Make of this what you will.

Karen and Michael, my two adult children arrived today with Mary Katherine and Randy and all of their children - my grandchildren. This made a difficult day much easier for me, as you can imagine. Children charging all over the place, (Miss Kitty flew the coop) baseball lit up the TV most of the afternoon, and plans for the week were tumbling over each other as they dug out skies, kayaks and paddles, tubes and pumps for the tubes and the blow up beds.

We also had a birthday party - for Drew, and for all of us because living all over the country, we don't often get to spend a birthday together. Two cakes, chocolate and vanilla - and candles. We lit the candles, gathered everyone around the table and as we began to sing Happy Birthday to Everybody, ONE candle blew out. All the others stayed lit throughout the song. Obviously someone puffed too hard on the "Hhhhappy... " and possibly blew ONE candle out - and only one candle - right at the beginning of the song.
It's the timing that's important. And its significance.

And I don't believe in Coincidence. Think Drew was there? Duh! :)

Does Like Attract Like?

Does it? It all depends.
If I'm walking along a sidewalk on my way to work, irritated to death with being bumped and jostled, looking  disgusted, possibly thunderous, I can promise you, no one looking at me is going to feel like smiling and spreading rose petals around my feet. Chances are, I'm going to make them feel even more disgusted than they thought they were when they joined this rat race.  On the other hand if I'm walking along a sidewalk humming a ditty, beaming at everyone I see, spreading good cheer and jolly good vibes - at 7:30 a.m. - someone walking around looking thunderous is going to sock me!
So, No. Like does not always attract like. It's like most things - use your common sense. Or your intuition. Intuition works well and isn't threatening.
At a recent book presentation, a young woman approached me and said, "I'm so confused. You read all this stuff about "Don't be negative, it attracts negativity. Stay positive at all times ..." Here's the problem, I have a good friend who's just lost a young child. I feel so sad (negative) when I'm around her that I'm scared to death this stuff is catching and if I spend too much time with her it's going to contaminate me and I may lose my own five year old child!"
No, no, and NO!
What happened to the child that died had nothing to do with anybody but that child's spirit. Here's what I believe: A spirit is born into this world for a purpose, and when it has accomplished what it came in to do, it leaves. A spirit enters this world in human form with its very own agenda. Its has its own blueprint that's charted the course of this life on earth. Nobody can change that! Not a mother, not a father, not a friend. No matter how positive or negative everyone is. The spirit itself is the only one that can change the course of that blueprint. That spirit could be surrounded with negativity and live to be a Katie Couric or a Queen Elizabeth or Donald Trump - if that's what it's plan is. Alternatively, it could be surrounded by loving people, good teachers and good friends and die young for a million other reasons - according to its blueprint.
So please know this, your friends who have lost children need you. They've lost too much already to have to face losing you - because you're afraid to get too close to them because it's just too sad and it might cause you to lose someone you love. It doesn't work that way. This is not contagious.
But I don't blame anyone for wanting to shy away. Death in our culture is a scary thing. It's much easier to deal with if we don't go near it.And the thought of losing a child is a very, very scary thing. So, stand back if it helps, think it through, be okay with it if you can and even if you can't, remember that friend whose reality this has become. Be there. Be honest, all it takes is something like - "I have no idea what you must be going through - but I'm here if you need me." 
What helped me the most was to be able to talk about Drew. So next time you see me say, "Tell me about your son." And I will give you the biggest smile you've ever seen and love you for asking. And bend your ear for the next three hours - or until you sock me.
So, get over it, worried Girlfriend, uncomfortable Man friend - help us deal with something that was completely foreign to us too - before all this happened. :)
 

When the GPS Screws UP!!

I've had some wonderful comments regarding "By Morning's Light" - from people I know, of course and many I don't.

It's so gratifying when people say how much this has helped them through a very bad stretch - or maybe someone they know. And when they tell me they've picked up several copies for people they think it will help - I'm blown away. Made speechless by your thoughtfulness and kindness. And it confirms to me that we're all in this together. We're all walking through this life side by side, and for the most part, we're all reaching out to help each other - to give one another a hand across a chasm in the road, a place where the road has  washed away - or where the fog is too dense to see... And while you're standing there spinning in your tracks, shaking your head, thinking "This isn't where I planned to be! Did I miss the road? What's going on?What the heck happened! Damn GPS!" Someone will reach out and say, "I'm here, hold on, we'll find your way back. We'll do this together."

Someone reached out to me not long after this happened to Drew, handed me a journal and said, "Write it all down. Everything. Every thought, every feeling, every memory." This dear friend knew about "chatharsis". She knew that by writing it all down, I would begin to feel better. I wasn't even thinking 'catharsis,' probably couldn't spell it either, but after a while I followed her advice. And as I wrote and relived Drew's life and his death, a strange thing happened. I began to look forward to "journaling" every day. (Something I'd never done.) And about 6 months into this, I actually could feel the load lightening, the darkness lifting. It was then that I began to think that if this could lift me - even a little bit - it might do the same for others And the more I thought about it the more the idea to put it into book form began to grow. And soon, "By Morning's Light" was born - thanks to a friend who reached out and helped me take the first step forward. That was Cindy.

I'm so glad we're all walking through this life together. I would have been lost without you.